dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Just cropdusted the office
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
