Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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