Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
