idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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