Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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