he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize
