I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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