The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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