what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
