what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
How external is "for external use only"?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize