Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize