Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
