it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Life is so much better after having sex.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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