oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
