I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
