it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize