I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
