Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
