I forgot how hot balto sounded
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
