I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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