He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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