Buhtt sex?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
