Christians are straight up FREAKS
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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