He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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