your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
