how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
