Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
