if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
