so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I will be naked everywhere
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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