At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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