is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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