It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
