so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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