Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Randomize
