I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
false alarm, still single
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