Define "chronic" masturbator.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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