Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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