When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
