i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
