ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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