I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
