Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  My new storm is the chrons

  (248): View more from Michigan

  The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one

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  (248): My new storm is the chrons (248): The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one<div>(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one</div> http://tfl.nu/7nnd
  Replies (5) Good night (2173) Bad night (883)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  # days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279

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  (281): # days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279 http://tfl.nu/pu81
  Replies (6) Good night (1270) Bad night (539)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?

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  (631): Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's? http://tfl.nu/f1lf
  Replies (46) Good night (1397) Bad night (2728)
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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva

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  (551): Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva http://tfl.nu/0m5z
  Replies (84) Good night (5487) Bad night (1737)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said

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  (810): i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said http://tfl.nu/bvpk
  Replies (41) Good night (6770) Bad night (927)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are

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  (717): we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are http://tfl.nu/vwno
  Replies (22) Good night (7371) Bad night (1240)
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  (646): View more from New York

  its my first week of college and i have a UTI

  (718): View more from New York

  not easy being a whore now is it

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  (646): its my first week of college and i have a UTI (718): not easy being a whore now is it http://tfl.nu/tyxw
  Replies (23) Good night (1544) Bad night (4730)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .

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  (913): You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" . http://tfl.nu/nj3u
  Replies (1) Good night (2120) Bad night (1207)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever

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  (814): He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever http://tfl.nu/aoid
  Replies (10) Good night (3641) Bad night (1182)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.

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  (850): Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time. http://tfl.nu/840u
  Replies (17) Good night (2034) Bad night (988)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...

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  (317): His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip... http://tfl.nu/pj0o
  Replies (7) Good night (1800) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..

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  (815): Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won.. http://tfl.nu/wk4z
  Replies (6) Good night (1545) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?

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  (256): i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime? http://tfl.nu/inlq
  Replies (12) Good night (2323) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.

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  (907): You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools. (1-907): That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day. http://tfl.nu/rl6v
  Replies (5) Good night (1680) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...

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  (313): You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing... http://tfl.nu/xgjw
  Replies (2) Good night (554) Bad night (1106)

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