Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I think a kid would responsible me up
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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