You're earring is so big in my mouth
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.