I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
How's your threesome situation going?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.