I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
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