You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
