your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
