I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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