I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize