Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
